Okay... so the entire Twilight series kinda drives me nuts.
'Kinda' as in 'makes me shoot off into a rant every time someone mentions it, therefore making it a taboo word very fast to anyone within the nearest fifty feet of me.'
So I'm going to try to dissect my strange loathing, which will probably result in about one million Sparklepires accidentally stumbling on this post while looking for Black Market pictures of Edward Cullen, getting hugely angry, forming together into one big Sparkle Vampire Beast Of Doom, and then storming down and setting my house on fire.
But I digress.
Item one: Bella DRIVES ME CRAZY.
Okay, so Sparklepires might not burn my house down on this one, because a lot of them agree with me, if only because they want to keep Edward to themselves (or, for Jacob fans, keep the two of them from ever having children). But seriously. She's just so... I don't know... cardboard. Like, all long suffering 'I'll die for you' one minute, and then a whiny toddler the next. But it's so... predictable. I guess she just seems really, really shallow. At least to me.
Item two: Edward ALSO DRIVES ME CRAZY.
And this is the one where a whole lot of crazed fans are going to march down through the streets with pitchforks. Except for the Jacob fans. I think maybe they are still okay with me. But Edward... can you say 'Typical?' As in dreamboy typical? So incredibly predictable, our dear Edward. Always the night in shining armor. Even though sometimes I swear he's riding the horse the wrong way around.
Item three: Jacob DRIVES MY CRAZY TOO.
And here's where Edward and Jacob fans will actually work together for once, with the singular goal of killing the heathen. But Jacob... I think that maybe it's not him, but it's such the cop-out, making him imprint on Bella's kid. I mean, it's like dear Miss Meyer suddenly saw him as a huge nuisance, being in love with Edward's girl and all, so she pawned him off on someone else.
My conclusion: I dislike Twilight because it's full of people who DRIVE ME CRAZY.
That's all.
Ima gonna go buy myself some fireproof jammies.
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Well, I generally keep to myself about this, 'cause most girls would kill me if they knew I said this, but I generally agree with Everything you said there.
ReplyDeleteI can't say I completely do, I haven't read the books ...
But you aren't alone, and if sparklepires start attacking your house... just call, I need to hit something other than a mountain, and a sparklepire sounds like a perfect target.
-Taylor
"Insanity 1" ;-)
I am anti-vampire regardless if the vampire is supposedly "good." I tolerated watching the movie after my wife purchased it, but it is definitely not on my "watch again list."
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